LH Long Haired Individual.

MH Medium Hair Individual.

SH Short Hair Individual.

U Usher.

Scene opens in the Feren’s Art Gallery Hull, where selected works of the Tate Modern are on tour. In one room displayed on three walls are: Joseph Beuys “Four Blackboards 1972”, Tacita Dean “The Roaring Forties: Seven Boards in Seven Days 1997”and Lucio Fontana “Spatial Concept ‘Waiting’ 1960”.

A Long Haired individual sits on a long dark wood bench in the middle of the stage with their back to us, looking intently at the Lucio Fontana piece. Two individuals, one with Medium Hair and one with Short Hair, stand at the front right of the stage with their backs to us. To the Opposite left side of the stage sits an Usher facing the audience, reading a book and looking bored.

Note: The Push is a pub in Beverley outside Hull.

SH: <Sigh> What time is it?

MH: 4:30, ten minuets after you last asked. He said he would be here, but you know work.

SH: Excuses excuses. Why on earth did you choose this place to meet?

MH: Ok I admit, I’ve been meaning to get a look at the exhibition before it moves to York.

SH: <Laughs kindly> Do you ever stop working?

MH: Sorry, art therapy hardwired.

SH: Saving the world one person at a time huh?

MH: Your work is about curing, mine is about healing; we argued about this in The Push last weekend as I recall.

SH: I will never understand what is ‘healing’ <sarcastically> about art.

MH: Ok, take them for example <nods at LH> you can actually see the transference in the space between themselves and the canvas. A communication of self emerges as a container for their violent needs. A ritual sacrifice establishing a symbolic boundary which then allows separation of those needs from the self into the object. Oversimplified version of someone who has boundary issues.

SH: You think they are engaging in therapy at the moment?

MH: The conscious mind doesn’t need to be aware of it.

SH: Looks like they are just sitting there to me.

MH: They are defining inner and outer worlds. The beneath the skin and the beyond the skin.

SH: Even if that were all true, what does that make us then, standing here watching them in this private act? Perverts? Personally I don’t get it. Doesn’t the book say it’s about “infinite void” nonsense?

MH: There is no limit to interpretation, it doesn’t matter what it means to them only what it means to the client. <Irritated>

SH: You sound very sure of yourself. I can’t believe that Lucio feller intended all of that from a one single cut in a canvas.

MH: Does it matter what he intended? Why are you being so negative today? Besides, it was never meant for you.

SH: But it was meant for them? Speaks to them does it?

MH: You could go and ask them.

SH: No thanks. Look it was a bad day, lost two this morning, one hanging, one overdose. Anyway, I’m stood here looking at it aren’t I. I’m not doing anything different to them. <Points in the direction of LH>. It’s so pretentious.

MH: Not really, you just interpret it as pretentious.

SH: Oh purrrlease; don’t start psyching me. It’s not real medicine any more than that is real art.

SH: <Mobile phone starts ringing loudly, SH starts checking through full pockets pulling out tissues and keys looking for the phone> Shit.

U: Clears his throat loudly and points to a sign on the wall behind him that says ‘Please ensure that all mobile phones are turned off.’

SH: Sorry. SH whispers loudly with embarrassment, turns the phone off without answering it and fumbles putting it away.

MH: Is he coming do you think?

SH: <Shrugs shoulders> That was probably him; we’ll wait five more minuets.


Waiting for Godot. Samuel Becket. Faber Paperbacks 1978 Edition.

Tate Modern: The Handbook. Tate Publishing 2006.

Self-Mutilation and Art Therapy : Violent Creation. Diana Milia. JKP Publishers 2000.

Pulse, Art Healing and Transformation. Steidle. ICAB 2003.

The Unknown Masterpiece. Honore de Balsac.

Stuckist Manifesto. Billy Childish.

Borges and I. Jorg Luis Borges.

Sigmund Freud’s Self Analysis. Jean Chiriac.